False Prophets

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False Prophets

Post by J1NX on Fri 19 Sep 2008, 2:43 pm

Create a fake bible verse about yourself and see how well we can fit together The Book of Game Group Psalms.

Mine in coming!

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Re: False Prophets

Post by J1NX on Fri 19 Sep 2008, 2:44 pm

"And lo god said let their be a computer more secure than any before it, and a computer came to be and it was good. Then god said unto the people, with the age of computers will come one to rule them as the son of all things electronic, and thus a hacker was made and he was better." - Book of

Jinx Chapter 4 Verse 6

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Re: False Prophets

Post by Darth_Kitsune on Fri 19 Sep 2008, 4:38 pm

"And god banished onto the world a demi-god in the form of a man. This man's name was Bitches and all that was good in this world came to be. He has assumed many names through the ages but none more awe inspiring than Darth Kitsune." Book of Bitches Chapter 4 Verse 20
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Re: False Prophets

Post by Aceofspades on Fri 19 Sep 2008, 11:11 pm

I looked, and behold, an incredibly sexy man; he who stood there was given the name Toast.. Authority was given to him over a fourth of the Earth, to command and bring astonishment to all who gazed upon his sexy being.

Toast Chapter 6 Verse 66
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Re: False Prophets

Post by Alcatraz on Sat 20 Sep 2008, 6:43 pm

"And thus the eyes of all were bestowed upon the making of a demi god. He would reign the incoherent of the world into a false sense of hope, yea, soon the beliefs of weakness in god were vanquished, as the upbringing of a tormenter among tongues was created."

Book of Upbringing Chapter 16 Verse 1337
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Re: False Prophets

Post by Alcatraz on Sat 20 Sep 2008, 6:48 pm

I'm seeing double!

Guess thisll make it triple?
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Re: False Prophets

Post by 0pp0siti0n on Sat 20 Sep 2008, 7:25 pm

"And thus, a man stands before them all."
Book of Abrubticus Chapter 1 Verse 1
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Re: False Prophets

Post by Guest on Mon 22 Sep 2008, 4:25 pm

"and upon the seventh day of the twelveth month of the seventy-eigths year of the ninteeth century since the day of our lord, and child was brought onto this earth to bring forth a cacophony that would resound to the heavens, and echo in return to man, that many would hear its thunderous reverberations in the mountains, and oceans, and across the flatlands, and man would raise his smallest and largest finger aloft, while concealing his middle fingers behind tightly curled thumb, and heads would nod with great force it rapid repetition."

Chris VII, chapter 7, verse 7.
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Re: False Prophets

Post by Guest on Tue 23 Sep 2008, 10:32 pm

*Starts by canting in Hebrew that nobody understands anyway*

(English translation) "And HaSatan returned from his wanderings upon the earth, and he spake derisively unto HaShem, blessed be He, whom created both heaven and earth and who chose His people Israel from among the nations, to be a people unto Him. And HaShem, blessed be he, laughed at HaSatan for his folly, and the laugh distrubed the whole of heaven. The cynicism of the Omnipotent was revealed, and HaShem,blessed be he, regretted that he had ever laughed. Thus, He vowed, saying, "This laugh shall I send unto the earth, upon which it may wander aimlessly to amuse and to distrub the whole of humanity. May she be a relief or an annoyance unto all whom she may happen upon." And HaShem did so, and saw Himself as good. And He called His creation: the procreator of dizzying joy." (loose translation of the Hebrew word:Abigail)

And HaSatan returned from his wanderings- According to the Sages, this refers to HaSatan's restless nature, and his never ceasing attempts to find fault with HaShem,blessed be he. Rashi differs on this point, however, citing that this is an allegorical reference to... well, something as is the rest of the Tanach. Ramban diagrees with everyone on this passage, but who cares because he's just a stupid Greek wannabe.

and he spake derisively unto HaShem, blessed be he - This passage may also be translated...

*and the commentary continues until it is 50 times longer than the original passage*

The Green Edition Chumash, Avigaiyil 23:13
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Re: False Prophets

Post by Aceofspades on Wed 24 Sep 2008, 2:42 pm

dear god! that was pretty fucking epix!
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Re: False Prophets

Post by scaramunga on Wed 24 Sep 2008, 4:19 pm

1 In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth. 2 And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters. 3 And God said, Let there be light: and there was light. 4 And God saw the light, that it was good: and God saw that she was not alone. 5 And Scara said, "Why didn't I think of that, I got the the whole 'Bang!' thing down pat, but I've been sitting here for the past week trying to turn on the lights."
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Re: False Prophets

Post by J1NX on Wed 24 Sep 2008, 4:28 pm

That sir is awesome!!

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Re: False Prophets

Post by Aceofspades on Thu 25 Sep 2008, 11:37 am

lawl, that sir is fucking amazing!!!
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